What’s Up?…Open Your World

Keep-Calm-And-Whats-UpSoooo….over a month with zero posts…what’s up with that?  Well I always said I did this for me, and I’ve been so friggin’ busy with work, where I also do a lot of writing, so I’ve kind of just let life marinate for the past six weeks.  I decided to finally write again, because I’d like to keep this going, and because I was waiting to see if Fab could get out of her funk.

I’m happy to say that she did.  She and I share an outdoor hobby where she is completely stealth within the community.  At the beginning of April we went out in nature for a long weekend, and it seemed to make her dysphoria go away.  She simply lights up in nature and it was just what she needed.  She came back from that weekend a different kid.  She’s becoming more comfortable in her skin as she figures out who she is.  She doesn’t need to wear dresses every day, and she has shown herself to be a fierce competitor in soccer where even with her petite frame she refuses to back down to anyone.

Her fierceness, most days, reflects how she tackles life.  She and I will take an outdoorsy trip as soon as school lets out for the summer, and I’m looking forward to spending that time with her.  For those who really know her to think of her as anything but a girl now seems completely foreign.  Even looking at old pictures I find it hard to recognize that kid.  Being trans is just one facet of many that makes up who she is, and this is often where people make mistakes when measuring or judging a trans-person.

I say the above because I want to share the following video, which is actually a Heineken commercial that has a trans-woman in it.  The point is, when we open ourselves up to the world, and actually take the time to talk then pre-judgements can be changed or reversed.  Judge a person for who they are, not what they are.  Enjoy!

 

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Love My Life

I’ve shared this elsewhere before, but I wanted to share the video here.  I first heard this song shortly after Fab made her transition, and it spoke to me.  It is all I could ever hope for her and her brother.  Robbie Williams isn’t known well here in the States, but I’ve always been a fan, and as he wrote it for his children it takes on that dimension in my mind.  Feel free to let me know if it resonates with you.  I think it hits beautifully upon all that I feel or could want from my children as they grow up.

Tether your soul to me
I will never let go completely
One day your hands will be
Strong enough to hold me

I might not be there for all your battles
But you’ll win them eventually
I’ll pray that I’m giving you all that matters
So one day you’ll say to me

I love my life
I am powerful
I am beautiful
I am free
I love my life
I am wonderful
I am magical
I am me
I love my life

I am not my mistakes
And God knows I’ve made a few
I started to question the angels
And the answer they gave was you

I cannot promise there won’t be sadness
I wish I could take it from you
But you’ll find the courage to face the madness
And sing it because it’s true

I love my life
I am powerful
I am beautiful
I am free
I love my life
I am wonderful
I am magical
I am me
I love my life

Find the others
With hearts
Like yours
Run far, run free
I’m with you

I love my life
I am powerful
I am beautiful
I am free
I love my life
I am wonderful
I am magical
I am me
I love my life
I am powerful
I am beautiful
I am free
I love my life
I am wonderful
I am magical
I am me
I love my life

And finally
I’m where I wanna be

No League of Their Own (Transgender Athletes)

no_league_of_their_own__transgender_athl1Fab is an athlete.  She has the potential to be great at whatever sport she chooses to play.  She was a phenomenal young gymnast before transitioning, and while her mother and I are open to her competing as a female gymnast (US Gymnastics is inclusive), gymnastics still serves as a reminder of her life as a boy.  We can see she misses it terribly, but if she goes back, that will be her decision to make.  She will play soccer in the fall on a coed team with the YMCA.  It will be a safe space for her, because I coach the team, her brother plays for it, and I have changed her gender marker with the Y.  However, it does give us pause as we contemplate her playing on all girl teams.  Unlike most parents, parents of transgender youth have to consider a sport’s governing body’s policy, or that of a school, school district, athletic organization, etc.  Some simply refuse to let our kids compete out of some misguided, false belief.  It is especially bad for MtF youth, where misguided notions are the worst.  Of course, then there are also the parent’s to consider and how they will take it if found out.  The solution is to stay stealth, but this is not always a possibility, and if your child becomes an elite athlete, then it will be very likely that they will have come out or risk being banned from the sport they love.

I just watched a great documentary on transgender athletes that was put together before the 2016 Olympics.  I thought it was well done, and did a good job of explaining the realities for transgender athletes, and more importantly how athletics can serve to be inclusive, not exclusive if we are willing to let it. Anyways, I wanted to share that documentary here for anyone else who has a budding athlete, or simply just because it is a chance to educate yourself on reality.  Hope you enjoy!

About a Girl

georgie-stoneFor today’s post I’m gonna take it to Australia.  Australia is the only country in the world that requires children to obtain court permission before going on blockers and hormones.  Currently, there is a brave 16 year old transgender girl, Georgia Stone, who is fighting to get this law changed so that children are not waiting on the courts to get the treatment they need not only for their physical health, but their mental health as well.  I took some time to watch a half hour documentary on her this morning (embedded below), and thought it was excellent.  Her parents took many home videos so you can watch her transition from young child to young woman.  In addition, as a dad, it is great to see her father so passionate and active in seeing that she gets what she needs to be happy.  He features prominently throughout the piece.  For anyone that might wonder what blockers and hormones will do, or for those who have family members with questions this is a great piece to share where people can visually see the importance of such treatments for kids like Georgie, my Fab, or any other child who has that need to see their bodies fully match who they are on the inside.  I think she is an amazing young lady.   I hope you enjoy!